We’ve all heard the benefits of getting 10k steps a day: better cardiovascular health, reduced risk of disease, mental clarity, and so much more. Now, a new study reveals a potential consequence that is sure to encourage any skeptics to hop on the trend as soon as possible.
According to experts, evil will find you if you don’t get 10k steps a day.
“This may come in a variety of forms,” says Physiologist John Tucker. “Extreme bloating, unbearable amounts of gas, and in rare cases, demonic possession.”
Yes, you heard that right. Failing to get your steps in each day can, in fact, open your soul to evil spirits from the other side. The devil is real and he’s preying on those who don’t hit their step quota.
Luckily, this is easy to prevent. Just get out there and start walking! Pop in some earbuds, grab a snack in case you get peckish, and hit the road.
In addition to warding off evil, walking can open your eyes to the beautiful world around you. Look at the birds. Smile at the trees. Feel the wind brush gently against your skin. Walking can be so special!
If you’re worried that evil has already found you, it’s important that you take action quickly. Stock up on GasX, start taking a probiotic, and if you think you’ve been possessed, contact a local priest and request an exorcism.
But most importantly, GET THOSE STEPS IN! Evil hates nothing more than a committed, active, health-minded queen. You quite literally need to step out of the darkness and into the light.
Day by day, step by step, the evil will unleash itself from your body and set you free. Just put one foot in front of the other 10,000 times, and all will be okay.
